Reactive Attachment Disorder: Forum Posts: Lighter Side
Things I’ve Learned from My RADish
There is no such thing as childproofing my house.
If you tie a jump rope over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to swing a 32-lb. girl.
But it is strong enough to spread paint (or any other liquid) on all four walls of the living room.
You shouldn’t spray paint the air conditioning unit’s fan.
Fish do not like to eat hamburgers and french fries.
A broken piece of glass can start a grass fire in less than a minute.
Don’t play with matches while in bed.
Our fire department has a 7-minute response time.
Socks put over light bulbs will start a fire.
Play Dough (or crayons) and microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
Dirty clothes cannot be flushed down the toilet.
Neither can hairbrushes, toothbrushes, or three rolls of toilet paper at one time.
Those blue toilet discs don’t clean up easily, nor should they be used as a decorating tool.
Vacuum cleaners aren’t for sucking up water out of the fish tank.
Motor oil in the car’s tank does not make the car run faster.
Cleaning detergent mixed with oil and brake fluid makes lots of smoke.
Candle wax poured into a light socket makes mom turn seven colors of red.
It takes about three hours to clean the inside of a dryer after turning it on with a bottle of syrup in it for five minutes.
Always look in the oven before turning it on.
-- TLPETTY
Last Modified on: Friday, March 02, 2007
“Don’t play in the street,” “Don’t play on the freeway,” and “Don’t sit down in the middle of the street” are all separate directives and are mutually exclusive of one another.
Repeating a statement louder will not necessarily make it heard. Neither will repeating it slower, in another language, or using American Sign Language.
It is quite possible for a 12-year-old boy to fit himself inside a clothes dryer.
Most people have no concept of what a “strong-willed child” actually is.
